I won’t pretend it didn’t hurt

I won’t pretend like my heart wasn’t broken

Shattered into pieces

I won’t pretend my dream of a whole family wasn’t ripped from my arms before I even had the chance to grasp it fully

I can’t pretend to make you feel better

I can’t pretend I didn’t sufferer irrevocable amounts of trauma

I can’t pretend the mere mention isn’t a trigger that jabs at my soul stealing every breath in my body

I won’t pretend my pain isn’t real

Valid

Still traumatic

I won’t pretend like it’s all ok now

Because it’s not and it may never be….

But I will move forward

I will hold my head high

I will protect myself and those I love against further affliction

I will push past the PAST